Journal: The broken routine

If all goes well, this morning will see the end of a novel.  If not, well, it’s probably because I’ve sabotaged myself again.  I got up this morning and went, “I can’t do this.  I can’t write, I can’t take out the trash, I can’t journal, I can’t put a bra on, I can’t do laundry, I can’t check social media, I can’t do any kind of maintenance tasks, I can’t do freelance work, I can’t do…”  You get the picture.  I was trying to swerve away from all the hard things.  Yesterday I pushed pretty hard, and I’m scared that I’m going to remain uncomfortable and drained all day today, too.  Fair concern.

How does one keep up a broken routine?  Easy answer:  start with good intentions every morning, then dismiss them when things go to hell. What if losing that routine isn’t [due to everything] “going to hell,” though?  What if it’s an opportunity?  Like I was jotting down the other morning:  when you have an opportunity that’s better than the routine, there is no shame in breaking the routine.  But when you don’t, or when you need your routine in order to make use of that opportunity–back to the routine.

If you liked this morning’s entry, take a look at what makes you break your routine (whatever that routine may be).  Is it “writer’s block”?  Is it the chance to jump onto something really cool?  Is it a series of small tasks that you really should get to, but honestly could do later?  In short:  what disrupts you?  Fear, or opportunity?

Also, wish me luck 🙂

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