I was screwing around with genres while journaling this morning:
Horror: We are all trolls.
With a splash of terror: Everyone is a troll but me, and now they’re after me!
Urban Fantasy: It’s the job of all right-thinking citizens to make a stand against trolls. Especially, you know, if we’re getting paid for it.
Crime: How the troll took me down, and I got my revenge.
Mystery: Which one of you is the troll? Scratch that, which one of you is the troll who murdered my sister? Sheesh, you’re all a bunch of trolls…
Romance: A troll hurt me once, so I never loved again…until now.
Historical Romance: …with dresses.
Paranormal Romance: …and the troll was literally a troll.
Noir: Sometimes it’s trolls versus trolls, babe, and you just gotta go with the lesser troll.
Christian: With love, even a troll can be saved.
Janette Oke: …on the prairie.
Thriller: When trolls turn DEADLY.
Epic Fantasy: A savior will arise against the troll who stands behind the throne.
Contemporary Fantasy: What you thought were metaphorical trolls…are literal trolls! Which is both terrible…and cool!
Slipstream: What you thought were metaphorical trolls…are actually science construct robots run by miniature trolls, and you might be one, too. Which is deeply unsettling. Don’t adjust that dial…
Magic Realism: The quiet suffering of the trolls must be understood.
Weird Fiction: Dig too deep into the nature of trolls, and you will find something even worse then trolls…something too horrible to comprehend…
Grimdark: If the trolls want this ruined land, they will have to tear it from my cold, undead hands.
Sword & Sorcery: My unlikely companion, Troll, and I get up to all kinds of blood, guts, and ADVENTURE!
Science Fiction: What if we went into space and found an alien society were run by trolls?
Mundane SF: How will we survive the inevitable worldwide society run by trolls, especially after we run out of petrochemicals?
Space Opera: We few rebels must resist the overwhelming power of a galactic society secretly run by trolls! Of course we will win!
Western: Well, I figure this here town run by a troll of a sheriff has something to learn about right and wrong, and here I am with a teachin’ license and two pistols.
Space Western: We ex-rebels have to teach this trollish society a little something about justice. Also, money. As in them not having so much of it all of a sudden.
Caper: So there’s this troll with a lot of money…what? What could possibly go wrong?
Fable: Once upon a time, there was a troll under the bridge, whom the main characters tricked so badly that you end up feeling sorry for him, kind of, if he would just stop eating people.
Alternate History: What if the Nazis idolized trolls as the master race?
Historical Fiction: Let us delve into the rich history of trolls, to explore where they came from, and their effect upon society now.
Steampunk/Gothic: A plucky heroine discovers an underground society of trolls abducted from the Colonies and forced to serve His Majesty as slaves. She prevents a bloody revolution and instigates peaceful social change while falling in love with a Duke.
Steampunk/WeirdFic: A washed-out inventor discovers an underground society of trolls abducted from the Colonies and forced to serve His Majesty as slaves. He accidentally starts a revolution and is haplessly dragged all over the place as brutal slaughter occurs around him and he finds out more than he ever wanted to know about the nature of reality, which is essentially broken.
Cyberpunk: An arrogant programmer discovers an underground society of trolls forced to serve the Government as online spies. He deliberately starts a revolution that gets out of control, then is captured by the Gov’t and forced to work against his former allies.
Erotica: Captured by trolls, the main character learns to break down all their inhibitions and become…more truly themselves.
Porn: Captured by trolls, the main character learns to break down all their sexual inhibitions and become…the Queen of Trolls!
Chick Lit: Finding out that you and all your friends are, you know, some kind of minor troll…but you all have each other’s backs once a tragic loss brings you together.
Suspense: You and a troll face off against each other through intermediaries until, finally, you are trapped together, forced to face each other directly…and only one of you will survive.
–What other genres would you like?
Also: Ack, I’m trying to sell books here! Preorders for my collection of horror/dark fantasy/ghost stories, A Murder of Crows: Seventeen Tales of Monsters and the Macabre is available here. The book will be released on Oct. 27th. Please preorder and help me get more visible on the charts on release day!