Adventures du jour!
Tropical storm Nicole is rolling in, turning the sky heavy but the air cool and fresh. Supplies have been gathered, laundry has been washed.–I should fill up the car with gas. I think that’s it.
Yesterday I ended up crashing and didn’t get any writing done. Hung out with Ray, watched some videos, called it a night. The last one of the videos was a song cover by a friend; I woke up this morning with a folk song about politics in my head and ended up writing it down while I was doing yoga. Right now I think it’s terrible, so I’ll leave it alone for a bit; it’s probably just mediocre AND me feeling self-conscious. I’m not really interested in singing it, but it was good to get off my chest. I’ll probably send it to the friend for a sanity check.
I felt this morning the same way I usually do when I’ve changed enough things in my head that something resets; even though I feel aware of what’s going on, I also often feel like I’ve died and been rebooted (like a character in a video game).
Today I could tell I’d hit that point somewhere between yesterday and this morning, but I don’t feel like I had that massive, discontinuous reset. It feels more like I got sick and mutated or something.–More butterfly-ish. I still feel like there was a massive internal meltdown and reset, but slightly less harsh than usual. It still feels like there are things that aren’t properly integrated yet, like there are internal sections of organs that I still don’t have a sense of. And THAT seems to be both literal and figurative; I just put my hand on my solar plexus and went, “THAT was not where I left it.”
Yoga: the sore spot in the hip remains pretty well gone. It clenches up when I hit the same category of angry thoughts, but for the most part it’s not bothering me. Balance on the new balance pose was a little better. I did a short version and rolled out on the foam roller for a bit; the joints around the sacrum were very sore this morning but tolerated being stretched a little that way.
I had to take a shorter walk this morning because I was using the different set of muscles again, this time burning up the fronts of the thighs. Tropical Storm Nicole is rolling in, and the wind is up and whipping things around, which makes me feel very witchy.
Got a prompt for a t-shirt this morning (not intended as such) and I sent it over to Ray, telling her what I wanted but leaving it open-ended; HER brain picked up the prompt and is running it forward. If she does it I’ll get the shirt and share it. I’m trying not to say “no” to creative things right now (see: song). I read Shonda Rimes’s Year of Yes a while ago, and it decided to be on my mind this morning.
I’m working on the thing that was freaking me out and forcing me to rebuild brain cells the other day, basically trying to find a way to leave most of it intact in the story and, at the same time, writing it all out as not-fiction so I can own it a little better. I might talk about it more later, or I might just make everyone read the book. I’m writing it all down inside a print book, a hardcover graphic novel, in the blank pages and the margins, and I’m finding this VERY cathartic. It feels both private and official, like I’m allowed to write my own work by virtue of writing everything down in someone else’s empty spots.
AND…
I got access to another AI, a writing one. I may disappear for a while
Wish me luck!